And One for the Glorious Art of Stingray Combat
We overslept. Again. It was only a little this time, though. Having your own room in a house can do this to you. We got lunch at some random place.
Our first stop was the Roman Forum. We saw the Curia, the House of the Vestal Virgins, the Basilica Maxentius, and the Arch of Titus. We also went to Palatine Hill, home of the Cryptoporticus, the outside of Augustus’ House (it was closed when we got there), some weird GRIFFIN HOUSE thing, a random cool cirus, and the Domus Aurea (Nero’s pad). Will played with a kitty in the ruins.
Before we left, I went to go find a bathroom. I accidentally ended up in an awesome temple to the goddess Roma. It was pretty cool.
To leave, we went into the Coliseum subway station. I tried to get onto the Metro, and two ladies with babies barred my way. They looked kind of like gypsies (they were). As I tried to politely get past them, they just stared me in the eyes and pretended not to understand. Suddenly, I felt something creeping into my pocket. Their third friend, previously hidden, was trying to pickpocket me. My wallet is chained to my pants, but I slapped my thigh (and thus her hand) anyways – hard enough to hurt, of course. Within a moment, the women had bolted. Jerks.
We went to the pantheon again. We succeeded this time. I played with a puppy. It was hungry…FOR HUMAN FLESH.
It was then time for the first of our two dinners. For our first dinner, we went down to that cheap place in Trastevere that we remembered. It was AWESOME. We had fresh bufala mozzarella, a fucking awesome pizza (one each), and a pasta dish. I had rigatoni with pecorino cheese and pepper, and Will had penne alla arrabiata. Everything was awesome, and you should cry.
Then, it got better. My mother’s old law student, Rosa, invited us to dinner at her house. Her husband, Flaviano, picked us up at Essedra fountain and drove us there. Rosa had cooked us a feast. As an apertivo, before the food was ready, she had these little bread things with tomato sauce on them. They were super tasty. For dinner, there was more mozzarella (we love that stuff), fresh fruit (we haven’t had any fruit, and there was cantaloupe and pineapple), a crazy Italian cheese (stracciata or something?) that she served with walnuts, prosciutto, salami, squash flowers with parmesean, and a crazy vegetable quiche thing. She served all of this with a tasty white wine. We were so stuffed we couldn’t move. Of course, that was when she served the spaghetti, perfectly al dente, in a tomato sauce. We politely refused dessert, but took home the dessert and some fruit. We would have loved to eat her crazy, awesome cake thing there, but we simply couldn’t eat more.
Rosa and Flaviano warned us about the dangers of gypsies, especially in Naples and Palermo. They had ARMORED SHUTTERS that came down over their windows. Apparently, all those circus acrobatics allow them to climb buildings and sneak in. Their best thieves are five year-old children, apparently. Will and I explained that we don’t have such problems in the U.S. because we have guns. In fact, we have a lot of guns. If they tried that shit in the U.S., they would just get shot. A lot.
Will’s Corner
Remember kids, always use protection. Or else the gypsies will get you.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Joe,
Your princess is another bar. Go find her!
Love,
Will and Andy
No comments:
Post a Comment